Funny English Errors and Insights
Laugh... And Learn!
Welcome tothe website for Funny English Errors and Insights (2010), a new book of unconscious humour published by the National Library of Australia.
Funny English Errors and Insights will be launched at the National Library in Canberra on 29th, October 2010.
In the meantime, explore this website for other collections of real-life English language mistakes,including funny answers to exam questions, media misprints, and silly signs.
See Funny English Errors: The B List for more than a hundred examples of funny English gaffes（失言）. For more funny English errors, read author Troy Simpson's blog. For still more examples,, join this website to download a free PDF version of English As She Is Taught, which lists our top 250 funny English language mistakes from that classic howlers book.
Join this website FREE, and you can also:
o Enter member-only competitions
o Contribute your comments
o Download free e-Cards
o Be the first to know about our much-anticipated book, Funny English Errors and Insights (2010) ...
Features
Follows in the tradition of the runaway best-seller Howler
s books of the 1920s and 1930s
o Includes quotes(引文) that have never been published before in this way
o Includes more than 30 carefully selected funny photos
o Topics include English, science, history, geography, religion, mathematics, and more
o A perfect gift for students, teachers, parents, grandparents, public speakers, doctors, lawyers, journalists, clergy and religious, and anyone with a sense of humour! The word launched in the second paragraph is closest to the meaning:
| A．sent up for the first time. | B．written for the first time. |
| C．for sale for the first time. | D．printed for the first time. |
On the website ,you can do the following things except .
| A．read some funny news |
| B．know something about this book previously |
| C．find a lot of examples about English errors |
| D．express your opinions freely |
About this book, you know that .
| A．it only includesEnglish, science, history |
B．it is quite different from Howlers books |
| C．all the quotes in it are familiar with us | |
| D．it is intended for people all walks of life |
The text is aimed at introducing .
| A．a popular website | B．some selected funny photos |
| C．a new book | D．some funny English errors |
Mom noticed that something was wrong when I started getting so thirsty. I’d have a lot to drink before bed, which was unusual for me. One time, I opened a big container of apple juice and kept refilling my glass. Before I knew it, I’d drunk the entire container! My mom called my doctor. I then had a few blood tests, and the results were certain — I had diabetes (糖尿病), which meant that the amount of sugar in my blood was very high. That can be dangerous, so I had to learn how to control my blood-sugar level.
My eating habits had to change in a big way. With diabetes, I can’t eat a lot of sugar or carbohydrates (碳水化合物). I have to figure out exactly how much sugar I plan to eat, and then I get an injection of insulin (注射胰岛素) before the meal to help my body process the food. Also, I test my blood-sugar level often. I’m always trying to keep my blood sugar at a healthy level. The level can drop when I exercise, but that doesn’t keep me out of gym class or off the basketball court — I just keep some juice boxes around to boost my blood sugar if I need to.
It’s a lot of work — and not a lot of fun — to keep track of everything, but I’ve gotten used to my new habits. I was a little scared at first because I wasn’t sure how my life would change. Once I knew what I needed to do, though, it wasn’t a big deal. My life is different now from what it was before, but it has become completely regular to me. The first paragraph is mainly about _____.
| A．who found the author had diabetes |
| B．the author’s life before having diabetes |
| C．how the author was found to have diabetes |
| D．the author’s eating habits before having diabetes |
What did the author do after knowing she had diabetes?
| A．She stopped playing basketball in the gym. |
| B．She controlled her blood-sugar level strictly. |
| C．She stopped eating food with natural sugar. |
| D．She tested her blood-sugar level before every meal. |
What does the underlined word “boost” in Paragraph 2 mean?
| A．Increase. | B．Control. | C．Absorb. | D．Test. |
What’s the author’s attitude toward her having diabetes now?
| A．Worried. | B．Frightened. | C．Pessimistic. | D．Positive. |
Professor Barry Wellman of the University of Toronto in Canada has invented a term to describe the way many North Americans interact(互动)these days. The term is “networked individualism”. This concept is not easy to understand because the words seem to have opposite meanings. How can we be individuals(个体)and be networked at the same time? You need other people for networks.
Here is what Professor Wellman means. Before the invention of the Internet and e-mail, our social networks included live interactions with relatives, neighbors, and friends. Some of the interaction was by phone, but it was still voice to voice, person to person, in real time.
A recent research study by the Pew Internet and American Life Project showed that for a lot of people, electronic interaction through the computer has replaced this person-to-person interaction. However, a lot of people interviewed for the Pew study say that’s a good thing. Why?
In the past, many people were worried that the internet isolated(孤立)us and caused us to spend too much time in the imaginary world of the computer. But the Pew study discovered that the opposite is true. The Internet connects us with more real people than expected—helpful people who can give advice on careers, medical problems, raising children, and choosing a school or college. About 60 million Americans told Pew that the Internet plays an important role in helping them make major life decisions.
Thanks to the computer, we are able to be alone an together with other people—at the same time!The underlined phrase “networked individualism” probably means that by using computers people .
| A．stick to their own ways no matter what other people say |
| B．have the rights and freedom to do things of their own interest |
| C．do things in their own ways and express opinions different from other people |
| D．are able to keep to themselves but at the same time reach out to other people |
According to the Pew study, what do many people rely on to make major life decisions?
| A．Networks. | B．Friends. | C．Phones. | D．Parents. |
It can be inferred from the Pew study that .
| A．people have been separated from each other by using computers |
| B．the Internet makes people waste a lot of time and feel very lonely |
| C．the Internet has become a new tool for a new kind of social communication |
| D．a lot of people regard the person-to-person communication as a good thing |
Which would be the best title for this passage?
| A．We’re Alone on the Internet |
| B．We’re Communicating on the Internet |
| C．We’re Alone Together on the Internet |
| D．We’re in the Imaginary World of the Internet. |
One of our biggest fears nowadays is that our kids might some day get lost in a “sea of technology” rather than experiencing the natural world. Fear-producing TV and computer games are leading to a serious disconnect between kids and the great outdoors, which will change the wild places of the world, its creatures and human health for the worse, unless adults get working on child’s play.
Each of us has a place in nature we go sometimes, even if it was torn down. We cannot be the last generation to have that place. At this rate, kids who miss the sense of wonder outdoors will not grow up to be protectors of natural landscapes. “If the decline in parks use continues across North America, who will defend parks against encroachment (蚕食)?” asks Richard Louv, author of Last Child in the Woods.
Without having a nature experience, kids, can turn out just fine, but they are missing out a huge enrichment of their lives. That applies to everything from their physical health and mental health to stress levels, creativity and cognitive (认知的) skills. Experts predict modern kids will have poorer health than their parents—and they say a lack of outside play is surely part of it; research suggests that kids do better academically in schools with a nature component and that play in nature fosters (培养) leadership by the smartest, not by the toughest. Even a tiny outdoor experience can create wonder in a child. The three-year-old turning over his first rock realizes he is not alone in the world. A clump of trees on the roadside can be the whole universe in his eyes. We really need to value that more.
Kids are not to blame. They are over-protected and frightened. It is dangerous out there from time to time, but repetitive stress from computers is replacing breaking an arm as a childhood rite（仪式）of passage.
Everyone, from developers to schools and outdoor citizens, should help regain for our kids some of the freedom and joy of exploring, taking friendship in fields and woods that cement (增强) love, respect and need for landscape. As parents, we should devote some of our energies to taking our kids into nature. This could yet be our greatest cause.The main idea of Paragraph 2 is that __________.
| A．kids missiiiu the sense of wonder outdoors |
| B．parks are in danger of being gradually encroached |
| C．Richard Louv is the author of Last Child in the Woods |
| D．children are expected to develop into protectors of nature |
According to the passage, children without experiencing nature will _________.
| A．keep a high sense of wonder |
| B．be over-protected by their parents |
| C．be less healthy both physically and mentally |
| D．change wild places and creatures for the better |
According to the author, children’s breaking an arm is ___________.
| A．the fault on the part of their parents |
| B．the natural experience in their growing up |
| C．the result of their own carelessness in play |
| D．the effect of their repetitive stress from computers |
In writing this passage, the author mainly intends to ________.
| A．blame children for getting lost in computer games |
| B．encourage children to protect parks from encroachment |
| C．show his concern about children’s lack of experience in nature |
| D．inspire children to keep the sense of wonder about things around |
There are three separate sources of danger in supplying energy by nuclear power.
First, the radioactive material must travel from its form of production to the power station. Although the power stations themselves are strongly built, the containers used for the transport of the materials are not. Normally, only two methods of transport are in use, namely road or rail. Unfortunately, both of these may have an effect on the general public, since they are sure to pass near, or even though, heavily populated areas.
Secondly, there is the problem of waste. All nuclear power stations produce waste that in most cases will remain radioactive for thousands of years. It is impossible to make these waste radioactive, and so they must be stored in one of the inconvenient ways that scientists have invented. For example, they may be buried under the ground, or dropped into deserted mines, or sunk in the sea. However, these methods do not solve the problem, since an earthquake could easily break the containers.
Third, there may occur the danger of a leak or an explosion at the power station. As with the other two dangers, this is not very likely, so it does not provide a serious objection to the nuclear program. However, it can happen.
Separately, these three types of dangers are not a great cause for worry. Taken together, though, the probability of disaster is extremely high.Which of the following is FALSE ?
| A．It is possible that a leak or an explosion occurs at a power station. |
| B．It is unusual for radioactive materials to be transported across land. |
| C．The containers are likely to be broken by an earthquake. |
| D．Nuclear wastes remain dangerous in most cases for many years. |
The author thinks that the ways to store nuclear wastes are ____________.
| A．easy | B．impossible | C．reasonable | D．ineffective |
What do we learn from the last paragraph ?
| A．The power station is a safe place. |
| B．The dangers of nuclear energy can be prepared. |
| C．The general public are strongly against the nuclear program. |
| D．Itself, none of the three dangers is very likely to cause much worry. |
What is this passage mainly about ?
| A．uses of nuclear power |
| B．Dangers from nuclear power |
| C．Public anger at nuclear power |
| D．Accidents caused by nuclear power. |
| Take Action for a Better World: Volunteers Needed Six months’ preparation in Denmark: Africa studies, team work combined with social work with risk group teenagers. Six months’ community work in Malawi in People to People Projects: Child Aid, HIV / AIDS. Fights and Teacher Training. Qualifications: 18 years, hard working and social engagement. Please contact us by e-mail: takeaction@ betterworld.com. |
| Part-time work with Exchange Students YOUTH International is a non-profit high school foreign exchange students organization. We welcome teenagers from over 80 countries worldwide and provide host families. The community Representative is a part-time position designed for people with a strong desire to do something rewarding in the community and earn some extra money. Applicants best suited for this work should enjoy teenagers, have a strong interest in cross-cultural communication and feel comfortable networking. Full training and support will be provided through branch offices throughout the US. Positions available in most states. If interested, please email staff@ youth. org or call 888—123—9872. |
| International Summer Job Hi, I’m an ESL student in China. I’m 20, quiet and polite, and I speak reasonable English. I’m looking for a summer job in an English-speaking country. I can teach Chinese or do house and garden work and cook Chinese dishes. Can anybody offer me a job? I don’t need to earn much, just enough in two months ( July --- August) to pay for my return ticket to China. My goal is to improve my English and see a bit more of the world. My email is: ram3462@ hotmail.com. |
| Call for Native Speaker of English I am looking for native speakers of English to join in an experiment. This experiment is carried out over the Internet. You don’t need any specific knowledge other than understanding and speaking English at a native level. The first task will take you around 15 minutes. After this task, you can decide whether you want to continue the experiment. The tasks involve reading texts and designing questions and answers. If you are willing to help me, then please email us: club3864@ hotmail.com |
Who is suitable to work as a Community Representative in YOUTH International?
| A．One who enjoys working with teenagers from different countries. |
| B．One who hopes to take action in fighting against diseases. |
| C．One who has a strong desire to improve his or her English. |
| D．One who wants to earn some pocket money in the program. |
Where will jack, a volunteer, receive the training before he is sent to work in Malawi?
| A．In some local offices in the US. |
| B．In an ESL organization in China. |
| C．In a preparation program in Denmark. |
| D．In an exchange student center in Africa. |
If Mrs. Black in the US hopes to learn some Chinese at home, she may contact _______.
| A．takeaction@betterworld.com | B．ram3462@hotmail.com |
| C．club3864@hotmail.com | D．staff@youth.org |
What are volunteers for an experiment over the Internet supposed to do?
| A．To interview people online. | B．To do some house work. |
| C．To offer advice on Child Aid | D．To provide language exercises. |
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